Jon Stewart blue pic

 Jon Stewart Intelligence Agency
    A n   u n o f f i c i a l   f a n   c l u b

We're fighting, apparently, with one of
Xena's web sites. It's a huge battle.

— Jon Stewart on the JSEB




May 26, 2002




Cool Stuff, by Annie
Assorted Poetry


Cool Stuff
by Annie

The assorted poetry was submitted ... a while ago. Hey! I was busy! I also added a few older ones to round out the collection. Enjoy. If you just joined the JSIA, rush over to for all the stuff you missed these last three days not being on the JSIA. It's so totally not worth not being on the JSIA, is it not?

*** Site updates, in no particular order ***

() Four new Jon Encounters have been added to the site. Melly's (yes, Melly AGAIN) encounter covers her trip to Jon's D.C. show with Rianna and Krissy, two other JSIA members. Amanda's encounter covers the recent Philly show. A different Amanda's older encounter covers a show Jon did in Atlantic City three years ago. And Shelly's encounter covers the Tribeca event Jon moderated.
Please send your own encounter stories to or she will totally kick your ass. I'm serious. Don't mess with Melly.

() Sara J. has accepted a position as Senator of the On-Stage Stewartlust. Her story, You Win, is housed at the JSEB at:
Speaking of which, the Fun Fiction section of the JSEB has been opened. Older stories have already been housed there, if you'd like to reminisce:

() Cassandra has accepted a position as Senator of The Way Jon Periodically Shuffles His Papers and Then Looks Into the Camera. Her poem is included in this newsletter (see below).

() There are some updates to the filmography, thanks to Dani's research:
Speaking of Dani, if you've not had a chance to check out her comprehensive bio on Jon, you should do that ASAP (Shalini notes that the only thing missing is dental records):

() Fourteen new articles and transcripts have been archived:

() A new Agent Roster at a glance section has been added to the About Us page:

() Crappy, rough versions of both the Jon Handbook and the Jon Timeline have opened, but frankly, I would suggest you wait a bit before visiting:

() The JSEB Arena has changed its name to the JSIA Arena. The Arena had closed for a short time, but Chaney used her powers of persuasion and I reopened it. For you newer members, the Arena is a discussion list on which you can talk about anything Jon or JSIA related. All e-mails sent to the list are sent to all people on the list. It is NOT the same thing as THIS list. THIS list can be posted to only by a few moderators such as myself. If you'd like to join the Arena, send a blank e-mail to:
The list is a good idea way to discuss Jon if you don't like web-based forums. Speaking of web-based forums ....

() If you're not on the JSIA Bulletin Board, you're missing a lot. The latest Batman influenced roundrobin fiction is in full swing, the Six Degrees of Jon Stewart game is crying out for your brilliance, and your missing your chance to share your utterly irrelevant thoughts about the great Jon Stewart. What are you waiting for anyway? Chicken? Never been on a board before? There's a testing area for you virginal types. And as always, I will answer any questions, as long as they're written in English. Portuguese questions, for instance, will likely be deleted. French questions ... maaaaaybe.

Annie, President
Hit reply to e-mail Annie


A Moment In the Life of a Jon Stewart Fan
by Cassandra

Searching, searching, searching
Every website, reading every article,
Saving every picture.
Watching Big Daddy, only bothering
To look up when Jon is on screen.
Stopping everything at 11:00 pm
Eyes focused on the TV
This half an hour is finally here.
The soulful eyes, gleaming mischievously,
The looks, the faces he makes,
You know the ones,
Before I know it, it's over
But the promise of tomorrow
And more Jon Stewart
Puts a smile on my face.

Cassandra, Senator of The Way Jon Periodically Shuffles His Papers and Then Looks Into the Camera


There once was a Stewart named Jon,
Whose fan base was particularly strong,
But though he might flirt,
with all things in a skirt,
He never cheat, cause tha'd be wrong!

Anonymous. Contributed by Sara B.


From the December 1999 JSEB Newsletter
by Krissy

The Daily Show,
I must confess,
is the bestest of the best.
With Vance, Mo, and Beth,
The Steph(v)ens and Jon,
and all the rest,
carrying on.

Without the show,
I surely will,
throw my tele,
off a hill.

Krissy, Secretary of Odds and Ends


Melly Haikus

The desk divides us.
He is on one side of it.
I am far away.

O hair with gray streaks.
Poofy and delicious too.
Please can I touch it?

Melly, Secretary of Jon's Eyes


Sara J. Haikus

One has streaks of gray,
Of my two Daily favorites -
The other, glasses.

Stories in his eyes
Kept hidden from all the world,
Seen but never told.

Sara J., Senator of the On-Stage Stewartlust

 |  HOME  |  SEARCH  |  JOIN

Copyright © 1999-2006  JSIA, JSEB, SSS.  All rights reserved.  Disclaimer.

Sign up for Dreamhost and we get a referral! Everybody wins!
Our speed ranking on is "Very Fast".

Sign up for Dreamhost